Monday, October 26, Midnight

Funny how two days can make such a difference in one's life. Yesterday, I was just a few minutes from leaving for church, when I made a wrong move and something "popped" in my hip and I went right to the ground. I was concerned that I had broken something, but couldn't figure out what or why. I gradually got up and walking was not even an option for a few minutes. I used John's cane to hobble to tell John I had something going on and I was worried about helping him get ready, because he was continuing to feel worse and in dire need of that blood transfusion. He was feeling so faint and weak, I was about to call Lori over to get us through the morning.

When Lori came over, she saw me with the cane and dad with the walker and she simply said, "Now are you two a cute pair" or something of the sort. She actually called my injury correctly. I pulled a muscle. Funny, it didn't hurt when I or moved my leg or was just sitting, but when I stood and put pressure on my leg, it was very hard to walk. Bruce Tall (our retired doctor friend) confirmed that it was a muscle. I have to let those who don't have a clue who Bruce Tall is, know he is always here with great medical knowledge and advise for us people from Paradise, California, that migrated to Utah.

Well, to get on with my story: This morning was a riot.... I can laugh now, but it was spooky at the time. For one, we over slept and had to get to the hospital for the transfusion. Well, John was getting ready in the bedroom as I got out of bed and in a lot of discomfort, John was busy throwing up. As I worked my way in to help him, he was bleeding from his nose as he was throwing up. Plus, he was too weak to move him and I couldn't move well enough to help him get dressed. So, if your could have been a fly on the wall, you would have laughed at this scene.

We got through it, but in order to make it on time, no breakfast, no meds and no insulin for john. Then, the real concern came when we both tried to get to the car. John's caddy was hard to maneuver down the front steps, he was still feeling sick and I couldn't move easily and John was unstable and had to keep sitting down. I was even afraid to leave him long enough to pull the car out of the garage. About this time, I was looking the neighborhood up and down to see if any of the guys were out to assist us, but couldn't leave him long enough to actually go get some help.

But, we finally got ourselves to the car and took a few deep breaths and went on our way.

Now, if you don't feel sorry for us by now, I don't know what more we could have gone through or that I could tell you, to bring it on.

Now, the important part of the message. John did fantastic on the transfusion. The nurse said if anything goes wrong (I'm glad I didn't know what she meant by that), it usually happened within the first 20 minutes. She also said something she probably shouldn't have told us, which is; "It's a good thing he is getting this today, he should have had this a long time ago, he really needed it." That comment disturbed me, but no need to make a stink about it to the doctor, she might get in trouble for making the comment at all. They said he should feel so much better and a lot of his bad side affects should subside.

This was a 5 1/2 hour event and by the time we got home, we were both ready for a rest.

I know John feels better, because he isn't as shaky and could walked more stable, but he was tired and went to bed early.

So, we'll see how he is when he gets up. We can deal with these trivial distractions... not to worry.

Nighty-night.

Thursday, October 22, 2009 10:23

Well, it seems I do have something to report, so here it is:

Today John had his rehydrating and it went well. He always feels better after this treatment. By this evening, the Cancer Center called us and said his blood results were in and his red blood cells are very low. John couldn't remember the counts... the good count and the low count, but they said way too low and they have scheduled a blood transfusion for Monday.

They VERY interesting thing about this news we received is, they said a low red cell count is the cause of his weakness, being so tired, dizziness, nauseous, feeling faith and any other symptom he has been suffering with.

So, we are looking forward to this procedure, which, by the way, takes up to six hours, and looking forward to him feeling much, much better.

We'll let you know.

Wednesday October 21, 2009 2:04

It was just brought to my attention that I did not update the blog from last Monday, when John had a treatment. Sorry, it is hard to focus sometimes.

We were pleased to hear his blood counts were good, so he could get the treatment, which he did. He had a good day Tuesday, but today he is feeling the effects of the chemo. I find the symptoms he starts showing and are normal are: Very tired, little appetite, not interested in much of anything to cheer him up and doesn't drink a lot of liquids.

When he doesn't drink enough, he gets dehydrated and then starts to show signs of being "spacey". When you ask him a question, it is usually answered with, "I don't know". Not meaning he really doesn't know, but he just doesn't want to think about the question. He seems to still get cold and uses wools throws during the day and three blankets at night. The house is pretty warm, just ask a few people that stop by.

They have scheduled a re-hydrating IV tomorrow at noon, as the are finding he starts to get weaker and shaky and unstable mid-week and the fluids bring him out of it pretty quickly.

I get asked a lot, "what can we do to help?" and I honestly don't know how to answer that question. To do for John, he just needs time to get these treatments behind him and anxious, as I and you reading this, what the final analysis is going to be. I am positive he is keeping a lot to himself, as he doesn't want to over stress me and likewise, I am keeping a lot to myself, so he doesn't ever have to think or wonder if he is too much for me to deal with.... which would never be true.

Our lawn is being taken care of, when I think I should be able to do it myself, but so thankful I haven't had to.

The real needs for us are being met by all of you, in some way or another. I see, feel and hear it each and every day. So, just keep doing what you are doing and we thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

Josh Warner has put up the handrail in the bathroom, which has already been a help and the walker, which John calls, "my caddie", is a lifesaver.

Lori is a constant in our lives and are so blessed to have her living so close to us.

I'm not going to start naming people and deeds, because I don't think I need to.

We are thankful for a wonderful Bishop, Relief Society and Stake Presidency, who encourage prayers and fasting in our behalf. We are so fortunate to live in this neighborhood and have the ward family we do.

It is comforting also, to know our Paradise, CA friends are so attentive and wish they could be here to support and help us. We think of them almost every day.

I feel, as many who are the receivers of service, that I should be doing something for someone else, so don't leave me off your list for compassionate service; I need the blessings from that too.

I don't think I need to report back for awhile, unless something of interest comes up. John has a week off treatment, then it starts up again on November 2.

I'm glad the blog is assisting us in reaching all of you in a way that couldn't be done as well.

Saturday October 17, 2009 9:15 PM

Since John's treatment, last Monday, he was great Monday and Tuesday. Then on Wednesday (as usual the third day after the treatment) he started up with the nausea and dry heaves. He had no interest in eating and being social at all. He was dizzy when he stood and very zapped of energy, so he did a lot of sleeping.

Thursday, he got the chills and couldn't seem to get warm. He was using sweats, two blankets and a heating pad. Not to mention, I am going to have to move outside where it is cooler as he would love to have the furnace set at 80 degrees. It probably is keeping people from visiting us. He was doing a lot of coughing and was very shaky and had a hard time even holding a glass. This is when I canceled doing Costco book signings during the week and only Friday and Saturday, when Lori is around.

During the night he was running a fever and I was afraid he was coming down with something to add to his plate already. I used cold clothes to try and bring it down and called my standby nurse friend, just across the street (We have two nurse friends across the street and they never seem to sleep; it doesn't matter when things happen, they are available), she said Tylenol would not hurt for him to take and sure enough, it dropped the fever down.

So, the latest was last night. When he was in the bathroom and turned to go back to bed (at 3:00, of course) he lost his balance and fell flat on his back and hit his head on the tile floor. I about fell myself, leaping out of bed when I heard him go down, and tangling the covers in my feet and legs. He said he was not dizzy or faint, but just lost his balance. He got a bump on his head and his left shoulder was hurting today. He has lost so much weight, the shoulder blades are just bare of any padding (Maybe excess weight is good to have). He was good after that and we are going to get some handrails put up in the bathroom so he can hold on the something to keep stable.

Needless to say, we are more than anxious to get to the clinic Monday, to see how his blood count is and hopefully get another treatment.

We'll let you know Monday night. Good night.

Monday, October 12, 2009 10:36 P.M.

John woke up this morning and even though he had not had any chemo for two weeks, he was having the dry heaves. Some of the time, he spit up some pretty ugly phlegm, so we were concerned whether or not he would actually get treatment today.

But, at 10:00 this morning, we found out that John's blood platelets were good and his blood test was good in all areas. So, they gave him a chemo treatment and we were happy he could do it.

He has felt good all day and we had company all evening and watched the football game. He just went to bed, so I think he did pretty well today.

I'm going to try and insert a photo and see how it comes out:

SURPRISE, I actually got a picture up. I'll try a get some more in the future.

In any event, we are both elated at how well this day went and still determined to press onward with a positive attitude and holding on the our faith and faith, prayers and fasting in our behalf. Some day, we hope to go through the 100 of get well cards he has received and personally write each of you. Thank you so much.

A lot of people are asking about my book, I don't want to incorporate it with "John's Blog" as it is for him. I will be adding a link of my web site soon. There are some new things and new recipes on there now, you can check it out at: www.NancyMilesInGoodTaste.com.

Thanks and goodnight.

October 6, 2009 12:20 AM

I wasn't going to write this soon, but it seems I need to.

Since he was not able to have a chemo treatment last Monday, he has been up and down with feeling really good and feeling really crummy. Thursday and Friday he felt poor. He just kind of sat there, not in the world, not interested in eating or any type of conversation. He had a sore spot in his throat that was making swallowing uncomfortable. The biggest problem was that he was so faint and dizzy that we really didn't want him to stand, even with the walker. I finally called the doctor's nurse, who is in charge of John's case, and she said to bring him in for an IV to re-hydrate him.

We told her that he had been drinking a large amount of water that day (Saturday), but she explained that if you are all of a sudden drinking a lot of water, which he was, it would take several days for your body to get hydrated, because when you drink water, most of it goes to your organs and a little goes to the cells, so it would take a ton of water or days of a lot of water, for it to get into the cells to keep you hydrated. But, when you use an IV, the liquid goes directly to the blood stream and gets to the cells quickly. I shared this with you, as it was new information to us and we thought it interesting.

So, after almost four hours of liquids going into him, he felt good immediately. So, we figured that was what was wrong with him. They thought the sore throat was a swollen lymph node. And the next day, Sunday, he felt very good. In fact, it is hard to even realize he has such advanced cancer.

And he felt really good Monday. He even felt like going for a ride and running some errands with me. Most of the time, he waited for me in the car while I did the "running around", but he wanted to go visit his friends at Target, so he went in and did some visiting and had a pizza for lunch there. It was good for him to get out of the house, but he went right down and took a long nap.

He felt well enough to have some company over last night.... of course the homemade apple pie was enjoyable too. And, tomorrow he hopes to see some of his favorite kids who miss seeing him at Target. And, this weekend we are looking forward to seeing our grand daughter, Aubree, for awhile.

Thanks, again and still, to those who are spontaneously bringing in food and treats. We had some wonderful homemade chicken noodle soup tonight and it lightened my load a bit.

Well, we will see what tomorrow brings. He has been continually drinking more water, so we are hoping that will take care of his dizziness. I guess the nausea comes with the illness, but he hasn't been throwing up very much this last week.

Each morning is a new awakening....... "How do you think you are today?" We'll see.