Monday September 28. 2009 10:42 PM

OK, here's what went down today:

We went for John's second chemo treatment, since the doses were changed. When they took the blood test, the doctor determined he was not a candidate for treatment today, because his blood platelets were too low. The lowest count that could be and still have the treatment is 149 and his count was 50. So, they told us we have to wait two weeks and then come in for another blood test to see if he could proceed with a treatment that day. So, we were sent home today. We were disappointed and not really sure if this will do any harm or not.

Last week wasn't a perfect week. He is still out of sorts at times, like running the walker into the wall and just standing there, not saying what he is up to, early in the morning. And, he gets light-headed often and better sit down, before he falls down. His appetite has been up and down and he has been able to see visitors and take phone calls.

As a lot of you know, we announced that when we got the CT Scan results back, if they were good, we would put a big yellow sunflower on the front door. We put it up and it is still up. On some of his not the best days, I've asked it he wanted me to take the sunflower down and he says "no". So, it is still up and we'll leave things the way they are for now.

Thank you for checking in and taking his mind off things and bringing him his forbidden treats of ice cream and Potato Spud candy bars. He does perk up with the sweets.

For the many of you who are checking on me, I am getting plenty of attention and getting the rest I need, even with the interruptions, I know I am doing fine. But I do love the little unexpected things that are showing up to make my evenings a bit easier.

Most know that my book came out of the gate, with the notices from Costco, Walmart, Sam's Club and events throughout the valley, the exact time we received the news of John's cancer. So, the commitments for book signings and appearances must be completed and some times it is hard to balance how John is feeling with my travels. For your information, out of 3,000 books, my distributor told me we have 990 left.

I do have a much better day, when I leave home knowing he is feeling pretty good or someone is just making a quick stop to see for themselves.

I'll just drop a note on the blog, here and there, until October 12, when he has his next doctor appointment, and let you know if there is anything you should know or that I should report to you.

We still have our same attitude and our spirits are high and always thankful for continued support, both here in Utah and in California. Hey, when I start to count the people, it goes into many other states, so I guess I can't just claim Utah and California. Thanks

Monday, September 21, 2009 6:48 PM

We went for the test results today and had to wait an additional 45 minutes, which added to our anxiety. But, the news was wonderful. "There was a significant reduction in all the tumors and the treatment had worked well."

So, the doctor told us we need to continue with the same set of chemicals and add one other one, but make them all a smaller amount, so his body won't have such a hard time accepting the treatment. We were all pleasantly pleased with these results. One of the tumors (his biggest one) went from a 3 cm to a 1 cm. in size.

They immediately started the treatment again and he will go for "2 rounds" and then that is all the treatment he could ever have. One today, one next Monday, a week off and then repeat for one more round. Then, another CT Scan and we will have the final results of this treatment.

It is obvious to us that all the fasting and prayers in John's behalf has created a miracle at this time. I hope you all have room to keep him on your personal prayer list and continue sending them our way.

I don't know how often I will update the blog, but rest assured, I will each and every day, if there is something to report. Let's say at least every Monday. Let me know if that is often enough for you all.

Love, from both of us

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Today was uneventful, with the exception that John had the dry heaves again.

He had his CT Scan and sent home to wait for the results, which we will hear on Monday, when we meet with the doctor.

Unless some unforeseen thing comes up, I won't do a posting until Monday.

Until then, keep the prayers coming.

Wednesday September 16, 2009

John woke up not feeling as good as he has for the last 4 days. Had some stomach pains and a bit on the faint side. But, he pulled out of it early in the afternoon and has had a good day since.

Tomorrow is his CT Scan and we are anxious for the results, but they will not be in until Monday. So, it will be a long weekend.

This is short, but sweet. We are both actually going to bed at the same time for the first time in enos of weeks. That means, John is feeling well enough to stay up later and I am not stressed with a ton of things to do to get ready for the morning.

Thanks again to our great friends and neighbors who know exactly what we seem to need and when we need it.

Tuesday September 15, 2009

OK, so I let a day go by without reporting in, sorry.

Yesterday morning John woke up with a pain in his left hip and shortly thereafter he had the dry heaves and was shaking pretty hard, which we and the doctor can't explain. He gets tremor like shakes and he can't hardly take a drink, so I hold the glass and he uses a straw. But within an hour, all these symptoms stopped and he was feeling good. We think his hip hurt, because he slept on the left side a long time and he is just bones right now. Can't explain the nausea, but it didn't last at all, plus, I gave his a nausea pill.

Today he was good all day. Lyle took him for a regular doctor visit, which got him out of the house for a few hours and it was good for a change. But he wasn't up to doing anything more than returning home and going to bed for a good nap.

He has gained a few pounds, up to 149 now, but didn't eat well today. He just doesn't have an appetite, except for the things he shouldn't have, because of his diabetes. But, I guess calories are good for him.

Until tomorrow, good night.

Sunday 9-13-09 10:55 PM

It is Sunday and the 4th day of feeling about a 7.

Last night I worded the message kind of weird. I should have put, 3 days and NO change from the old John, which simply means he feels and acts back to the pre-cancer state.

In any event, he is very happy with how he is feeling and we both would like to wish the next 7 days to be gone. Just a reminder to you all: The scan will be this Thursday and the results in the following Monday, the 21st. So, no idea what the next step will be right now. We'll just keeping doing what we are doing and hope you will also.

Hope you all have a great week.

Saturday Sept. 12, 2009 11:08

OK, day three, change from the happy, upbeat, loving man we all know. Except, he hasn't used the walker today, but the cane.

One day at a time.

Friday Sept. 11, 2009 11:46

With all that is going on, good and the bad, it is getting later every night in getting the update to you.

This will be short, because all is quiet for the second day in a row. John is still feeling very good and able to, more or less, tend himself. He is still using the walker, which he calls his "Cadillac", but I don't have to help him get dressed.

Oh, but I have to tell you this: John woke up and said, "Boy am I tired. I had nightmares all night. I was fighting a big war all by myself and I am exhausted. But, the good news it, I won."

We talked tonight about how wonderful it is to see such a huge change in him from being so ill to feeling so good. We are hoping this might mean the chemo do take a lot of the cancer cells out. The 17th is still too far away.

The only thing you need to think about right now is, if you want to visit, please call ahead of time so we can get the big dog in the backyard, so he won't jump on anyone or get out the door and run away or get hit by a car. John is up to some company, but probably best to make it short.

Until tomorrow, good night.

Thursday, September 10, 2009 10-13-09

Well, I'll be..... John and I both slept without interruption. He woke up happy, feeling better than he has in months and you wouldn't believe it, but he was even singing. Now, go figure!!!

I guess that is what 3 "flushing outs" did to get all the poison chemicals out of his system, that was making him literally, deathly ill. Let's pray the CT Scan shows some positive results. That's on the 17th.

So, He had a wonderful day and ended it with a homemade dinner from one of our sweet neighbors and watched the football game.

I am elated over this day and actually look forward to another good night's rest and a repeat of this day tomorrow.

It's early to bed for me....... Good night to all

Wednesday September 9, 2009

Well, we went for the "flush out" today and it turned out to be just another rehydrating. They explained that they want to give him more nutrients, vitamins, electrolytes, etc. and a lot of fluids, so he can eliminate the chemicals in his body still. They will not move up the date of the CT Scan, so we still have to wait until the 17th.

We came home and John went to bed and slept for 5 hours. And I gave in and had a nap too. He had a good appetite and was up to seeing several people that stopped by with the "come in" sign on the door. I think I will change the signs on the door to Red for "sleeping or don't knock" and Green for "come in and visit". That way, people will know by the color of the note whether to come to the door.

We are blessed with the young men in our church ward, who came and did some needed yard work and many others with support. It would be impossible to mention everyone and I would not want to forget anyone, but you all know who you are. You are all needed and seem to know when the time is needed. Loved that pumpkin chocolate chip bread!

We are planning on a calm, good night's rest tonight and see how tomorrow goes.

Tuesday September 8, 2009 10:10 PM

I did decide to call upon our friend and neighbor, who is a flight nurse and lives a few doors down, to come over and take a look at John about 4:00 AM. She came over and went over his blood sugar count and his heart rate. He was getting more alert, but didn't know who she was. In time, we decided he was stable enough for now.

I heard back from the ER rep. and she advised me to contact the doctor and go over the symptoms we have been dealing with. After hours of waiting, they set up an appointment for tomorrow at 8:30 AM to come in for an IV and they are going to "flush his system out." I don't know exactly what that means, but it sounded like a good plan to me, if it means to get the chemicals out of him that are causing all this trouble. I'll ask them if this means they can take the CT Scan sooner and start him on another treatment program.

As the day went on, John was feeling really good. He decided he wanted to get out for lunch and go see his fellow workers at Target. We went over and he was so welcomed by the staff. I bet there were at least 10 people that took a break and came over to talk to him and tell them how much they missed him there at work. I know he felt very good about that visit and it made me feel good to see him react to getting out and getting caught up with them. They have been so supportive and been following up on him all the time.

So, we'll see how the night goes and I'll report in after I know more what tomorrow's procedure entails.

September 9, 2009 5:10 AM

It seems that night time is nightmare time. Sleep comes and goes with strange things happening. John gets this tremor thing going and I wake up to what reminds me of a California earthquake. The first thing I think of is his blood sugar is low and he seems to be in a coma like state. I can talk to him, but his speech is slurred and he is slow to respond.

The questions that go through my mind is, do I call 911, should I get him up. Yesterday he took a fall getting out of bed and I couldn't help him up, because when I tried to hold him, it hurt his insides. So, in his own attempt to get up, he fell a second time. Of course, one would always worry about the famous broken hip scenario, so in reality, I don't know how to help him up.

More questions come do mind. I have two nurse on my street, just one and two doors down, but should I bother them? It is like crying wolf, as they have been over several times and things work out OK. It is truly a dilemma and a frightening thing to deal with. These could be life threatening issues and I just don't know where to turn. We have been to the ER so many times, they practically know us by name, yet on the other hand, they keep him there for hours or admit him, so I guess we are doing the right things, some of the time.

I was given a phone number the last time we were in the ER, from Social Services, who told us "the next time we have a medical problem, which we are going to have, we can call them and leave a voice message and they will get right back to us." I left them a message around 4:00 AM, but I know they don't start answering until 8:00 AM.

So, I am unable to sleep, sick with worry and want someone to tell me what I should do. For now, I will try to get him up, out of bed and see how he responds. Of course, the fear of him falling is prevalent, and I almost hate to bother him as he needs the rest.

I'll give you my decision and update later today. I maybe shouldn't have even given you this one, but I did anyway.

Sunday 9-6-09 11:20 AM

As you know, John is no longer on the chemo treatment and yesterday, Saturday, he was feeling a lot better. However, today he is kind of in a dazed state. He woke up in the night several times, was restless and his feet were "on fire" from his neuropathy. So, he didn't get a good night's rest.

This morning he was just sitting and looking out of it and he couldn't explain his feelings. He just said he didn't know what was wrong, but he didn't feel good. He is shaky and unable to get around without the walker. A bit later, he thought he was just plan worn out, tired and sleepy. His blood sugar was good, so it was not that. He ate pretty good, but just wanted to go to bed, which he did.

I just check on him often and let him sleep. I guess this is normal.

September 4, 2009 9:17 PM

Today, we went to John's 4th chemo treatment and met with the doctor beforehand. We went over all the side effects he was having and the difficult times he has been having. Especially the dizziness, tremor like shakes, falling down, slurred speech and foggy thinking. The doctor said, "We can't give him this treatment any more or it will kill him." He said he was not responding to the chemo like he thought he would, i.e. no vomiting and no hair loss, which he has been having almost every day, which surprised the doctor.

So, today they gave him an IV to rehydrate him and have taken him off all treatments for two weeks. He wants him to get back to some sort of normality, then take another CT scan and see if the cancer has spread or the chemo has helped in any way. He will stay on the pain patches and his pain has been in much better control with the patches.

The CT scan is scheduled for September 17. I don't know if everyone would like me to just check in and give a one liner on his day, each day, or you can wait until I have something to report. The problem with the waiting is, you never know when that time will be for reporting. We have had phone calls and emails asking for updates on the blog, so the word I am getting is to update once a day, which might be a drag for you all, but then you'll know.

I think we are both relieved that we don't have to worry about what he will be like in two days from his chemo treatment, which was always the worst day of all. His appetite was better today. One of his buddies took him to lunch today and he said it was the first time in a long time he felt like eating and tonight he ate well.

Let's hope for a good night's sleep for us both and that he won't wake up with the dry heaves and feeling crummy. I know a few people that would not have used "crummy".

"That's all folks"